If you just got engaged, your first instinct might be to open Google and type “how to start planning a wedding.” We don’t blame you—it’s a big deal to plan your nuptials, and it’s unlike any other party you’re hosted before. When you’re not sure where to start planning a wedding, narrowing down the first steps can feel downright overwhelming… but don’t worry. We’ve got you covered.
Start Thinking Big Picture
The minute you get engaged, everyone will ask for your wedding date. In reality, though, you won’t be able to set an exact wedding date until other major decisions—like setting your budget—are made. Rather than diving into the nitty-gritty details, we recommend thinking about the big picture vision. What time of year do you want to host your celebration? What wedding venue style sparks your interest? Are you drawn to intimate, outdoor boho parties, or would you rather have a glam formal affair at a chic city rooftop? How many people do you want to invite? These are key details to consider before you move forward with any decisions. Other decisions will fall into place once you have an overall vision.
Set a Wedding Budget
It’s critical that setting your budget be the first step in planning your wedding. Budgeting isn’t the most fun task, but it sets the rest of your wedding planning process into motion. It would be awful to fall in love with a venue, vendor, dress, etc., and realize it’s completely out of range. So sit down with your parents or other potential contributors to come up with a total budget. Then, divide it up by vendor or service accordingly. If you aren’t sure how to set a wedding budget, check out our “How to Set a Wedding Budget” Guide!
Find Your Wedding Vision
Before you sample a bite of wedding cake or consider DJs, determine the vision for your wedding. Once you’ve done some big picture ideating, narrow down what you want your day to look like. Would you prefer a candlelit evening in a mansion or a barefoot ceremony on a tropical beach? While you’re picturing your perfect wedding, answer these key questions: Will you have a big or small wedding? Do you prefer indoor or outdoor? Are you inspired by a certain wedding style, like modern, classic, romantic, vintage, rustic, or all-out glam? Will it take place at home or at a special destination?
Choose Your Attendants
Your attendants do a lot more than just stand next to you on the day of the wedding. Get them involved now. While some couples opt not to have any attendants at all, most choose between 2 and 12 members of the bridal party. Look over these lists of responsibilities for bridesmaids and groomsmen before you make your final choices. If they live nearby, it’s nice to ask someone in person, but a phone call is fine for those who live far away.
Find Venues for Ceremony and Reception
Many popular venues and even the less conventional options are booked a year in advance. The further in advance you start looking, the more likely you are to get the time, date, and cost that you’ve planned for. Get a free quote to book our venue.
Get Support
The successful bride and groom do not plan their wedding alone—they get help. This may be from professionals, respected publications, online app resources, or trusted friends who’ve planned their own weddings.
- Consider hiring a wedding planner or consultant. A professional can be invaluable in putting together your ideal day and can often save you money.
- Use online checklists. They’re free, and especially helpful if you’re planning with your mother or future spouse in another state. They’ll help you stay on top of all of your important to-dos.
- Buy a wedding planning book! Long form content like books can teach you more than one article ever could.
By now, you know how to start planning a wedding. But here’s one planning task you won’t find everywhere: take time to actively not plan your wedding too. Wedding planning might be the first big test of your marriage. It’s a long (but rewarding) gauntlet of compromise, sacrifice, and stress management.
Before your wedding, take time as a couple to do anything but wedding planning. Have regular date nights with no wedding talk allowed. It’s more important than ever to prioritize your relationship and continue dating each other. It will help you remember why you’re doing all of this in the first place.
